Things Australian

There are many things worth noting about the difference between Oz and ATX, America. And as the saying goes, it's just the little things, that mean so much. So I'll tell you a bit about what I've observed in my 4 months down under.

First things first, the women here spare no expense on beauty. It is not uncommon for them to be fully decked out in party make up at 7am for a play date in the park, and not at all surprising if they show up in heels. They even make little plastic knobs to put on the end of your stilettos so you don't sink into the grass at weddings or other outdoor functions. They love them. They all know how to walk in them, even the young ones. I have met several women with hair extensions, and even fake eyelashes sewn in. Baffling, coming from a town where most women don't even bother with make up. Even more baffling? The men LOVE IT. Seeing girls all tarted up is what gets them going. A bit dissapointing. I do believe, however, Hollywood is to blame for most of this, as they are also obsessed with American media. Most of their TV is American, and they get all the US films, if not a bit late. No wonder. Entourage is one of their favorite shows.

NOW-I am willing to admit that this could very well be going on right under my nose in my own home town and me be none the wiser. But that is the beauty of traveling. You see everything as if for the first time. You notice the little things, like all the pretty sculptures and fountains, the street art and graffitti. What people are wearing, their slang, my favorite thus far "Sweet as!" meaning "awesome" or in my terms, "baddass"..the not so great ones like "you reckon?" or using Zed for "Z" . The mispronunciations of the words herb and tomato still shits me. (Yet another slang term for being a pet "hate"/pieve)
You could go all day with an aussie exchanging what word we use for this or that, as they have created their own little language within the English one. Another one of my favorite things they do is give people obscure nicknames, like Flick, Jono, Simo (for John or Simon, still not sure what Flick is short for) or for a different example, if they think someone looks like a "serial" killer, nicknaming them Kellogs. Adding "o" or "ie" to stuff after shortening it is a typical slang rule in Oz, although there are many exceptions, like "arvo" which means afternoon...where do they get the "v"? Furthermore, they have several other colorful words to mean, ahem, "f-ed up" in our terms. Stuffed, rooted, shagged, etc, etc.

At any rate, these are the things I see in my everyday life in Australia. The women are slutty, the men are hungry, and everyone is a little bit potty mouthed. They drink alot, but NEVER drinkdrive, and depending on who you meet, they may just take you for a ride.